Sunday, July 13, 2014

Children and Restaurants. 6-27-14

I never got around to sending this, but it needs to be said--

Dear Cheddar’s and any other restaurant so challenged:

I had a very frustrating experience at Cheddar’s the other day. I hear lots of non-parents talking about how they hate to dine with children around. Well, the truth is: the restaurant is a part of the problem. We had 5 adults and 1 toddler at the table, and we spent about $80 on a meal. It was just as terrible an experience for me as it was for the people around us. This is particularly bad because we were celebrating an accomplishment for our student, and I wanted my toddler to meet a friend for the 1st time. Here are some tips (many of which should go without saying):

1. If you don’t want a child in the way of people entering and leaving the kitchen, don’t seat a child there. It’s not like there weren’t tons of other tables, too. And it’s not as if we were being punished by being seated by the kitchen (Boop ran into one of her daycare friends there, seated in a more remote location). It’s hard for a toddler to set still through a long meal (more on that later). Please don’t set a child by the kitchen if you don’t want them blocking the kitchen! Pretty rude: a waitress complained about us being in the way of people entering and leaving the kitchen. She’s potty training. She wants to see your fish tank. She’s having to wait on food. Take some responsibility!
2. Don’t serve a toddler a 16 ounce cup of milk—even if you have one of those plastic lids. SIXTEEN ounces. After making the mistake at another restaurant, I knew to request an extra cup. Most places have enough sense to bring one out when I ask. Our waiter looked at me like I had 2 heads when I asked for one. I had to request it from our waiter THREE times. I should have just poured the milk in the center of the floor myself.
3.  And napkins. DO bring napkins. Yes, yes, I know about the ozone layer and widespread deforestation. And those paper dinner napkins cost a mint. But can’t we make some accommodations? I mean, you just brought us a SIXTEEN ounce cup of milk. And baby wipes can only do so much. Some waiters and waitresses have enough sense to bring them out when they see a toddler coming. Most waiters will bring them out the first time I ask. Again, this waiter took THREE requests. The 3rd time is not the charm. Even adults ask for more than 1 napkin. I asked for extra napkins in my wild and care-free pre-mommy days.
4. I take time to plan before we go out. I want the meal to go as smoothly as possible. I look up your menu on the Internet and plan our meal in advance. I make sure there is macaroni and cheese. Otherwise, I pack her dinner. I depend on that macaroni and cheese. It’s the only food that she will eat no matter how it is prepared. Don’t run out of macaroni and cheese (or other such menu item), or at least have sense enough to substitute something similar. Seriously, you’re out of macaroni and cheese?!? And it’s only 7pm? There’s a Super Walmart and a Giant Eagle less than a block away. Heck, you can find a cow and wheat less than a mile away. GET MY DAUGHTER SOME MAC and CHEESE!! Or even easier. You know that penne pasta with veggies and alfredo sauce? How about making just penne and alfredo?
5. DO make sure your waiters know the menu items. We can’t have macaroni and cheese. I see yogurt on the menu. My daughter likes yogurt. We’ll try it. I ask about the apples; he said that they are chopped up in it. I comment 'she’ll just eat around it.' Impossible. I ask about the cinnamon; I’m hesitant. “Oh, there’s just a little bit.” They bring the cup out, and basically, it’s a Waldorf salad, substituting yogurt for mayonnaise, with tons of cinnamon and golden raisins. One look and I knew it was a no go. I couldn’t eat it either: lactose intolerant.  I explained this was not what we were told. He brought out French Fries. She doesn’t like white potatoes but will sometimes eat fries. Not tonight. My friend gave her a few bites of grilled cheese. We wound up ordering that.
6. Don’t assign us a waiter/waitress without kids, and apparently without a lick of sense. ‘Nuff said.
7. DO bring the kid some food! It seemed like every time I came back from a walk, my friends were getting another course of food. Boop had nothing. Seriously, do they have to wait through the appetizer course and the soup course to get their non-existent macaroni and cheese? Waiters and waitresses who have a clue offer to bring food out to toddlers early. And by the way, restaurants make things so awkward when bringing out multiple courses. There's always someone who doesn't have a soup or salad course. It is the most awkward thing to try to eat when others aren't, and well, it's poor etiquette. Why don't servers ask if they want things brought as a separate course, but I digress. That probably will never change. However, if you had fed us, and she had started acting up, we could have just left. Instead, it was 2 hours before she got something she could eat.
8. Don't keep large potted plants (or other potential accidents) along the sides of the banquets. Cheddar's: your insurance company called; they're dropping your coverage. Seriously though, little ones like to stand in the seats. The thought of her pushing one of those planters off gave me some stress. What's worse? An adult losing their balance and knocking these things off and smashing a toe, or perish the thought, a tyke. Ditch the lawsuit-waiting-to-happen.
9. Speaking of seats, why have rickety booster seats? They rock around in the banquets and don't do very well in the chairs, either. Another accident waiting to happen. I can understand why she wouldn't want to sit in them after hitting her jaw. But, at least they appeared clean. Better than a certain Denny's could claim. I will say that the booster seats at Cracker Barrel are quite nice. They actually strap to the chairs. Learn something from your neighbors. If you want little ones to stay in their seats, provide a decent place for them to sit.
10. Do keep the fish tank. Boop has been talking about it for a few days. It was a nice distraction, even though it was on the other side of the room. Just don't expect little ones to not want to see it when they are sitting in their seats. And again, don't sit them by the kitchen so they block certain waitresses when the little ones have to go see the fishes again. Some restaurants even have pricey crayons and paper to occupy kids. Sure, it’s annoying when we parents have to pick crayons a million times when it becomes a game, but we’re actually pretty grateful about those crayon-dropping games. It means our child is relatively quiet and sitting in her seat.


True, my daughter is no angel. However, some places have a knack of bringing out the worst in her. And even the best child will have a meltdown now and then. Some relatively easy steps could avert crisis or make it less distracting to fellow restaurant goers.
Sincerely,
Boop's Momma

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