Papers of lists strewn everywhere. I'm trying hard not to forget the mountain of things I need to. And no, I didn't forget. It's practically September already. I wonder if Boop is fighting me or if it is just some lag in those executive skills. She doesn't want to leave. I walk out of a room, and the next time I look, the room is in chaos: trash, dirty laundry, dirty dishes. This does not bode well for having my house on the market. We are blessed that my house could actually turn a profit after all of these years. So much work is left to do on this house, but at some point, I will just need to leave it to the next occupant. I haven't had time for the emotional work and for processing all of the doubts that go along with a big transition. I know I need to be strong and independent, and model that behavior for Boop, but some days, I just want someone to make the decisions for me.
I am buying a house that I haven't really seen. I made an offer on one, but I had so many misgivings. I then made an offer on one that I thought was similar, but it isn't as much house for the money. It is so against my nature not to get a good deal. However, I just have to accept this will be my home until Boop gets out of high school. Boop is not happy about the change in middle schools with the most recent house. Going from the #7 school to the #8 school in the state is not so bad in the grand scheme of things.
And so, I'm forging on. Trying to mentally be in two different places at once. It's taking its toll.
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